The one where I fall apart – just a little bit   3 comments

I am freaking out.  I need to talk about this but I don’t know who to turn to.  I’m feeling so much right now that I don’t even know how I feel – I feel happy, sad, stressed, elated, terrified, excited, worried etc etc.  It’s all getting a bit much now.

About two weeks ago my dh and I had unprotected relations.  Smart? Notsomuch.  But what is done is done and I guess the best of us find ourselves in these situations every so often? Yes?? Please?  Anyone????? 🙂  We have only been using cond.oms since the birth of my daughter 5 years ago, as I have become a lot more careful about what hormones I put into my body, and my dh was happy with that.  But after 5 years of CAREFUL cond.om use we have started getting careless every now and again.  Mostly it was still fairly careful carelessness (lol) e.g. faaaaar away from ovulation times, with no happy ending without cover etc etc.

BUT this last time – notsomuch.  It happened 3.5 days before I ovulated.  With no protection whatsoever.  Of course when I checked dates the next day I was tempted to get the morning after pill, but after reading up on it I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.

I’ve always mentioned wanting a third child.  I often mentioned it to my dh but alas he is (and always has been) very, very anti the whole idea.  Extremely anti.  As in look me in the face and hiss “IWILLDIVORCEYOU” kind of anti.  I certainly wasn’t planning another baby right now – but I was still very hopeful that someday…  So for me there is much potential joy and excitement amongst the fear and stress.  I am very worried about how my dh will take the news, if indeed there is news to share, so I haven’t even worried him with the possibility that there may be worries ahead, just yet.  Hence my need to share here before my head explodes!

What will my dh say? Our house isn’t big enough! Our cars aren’t big enough! How I will I cope with 3 children? Oh my hat what if it’s twins?!? are just some of the thoughts whirling through my head all the time these days.

It’s exhausting being on such a rollercoaster when at this point I know nothing really and I may not even be pregnant!  For now all I know is that today I am on day 28 of a cycle that is usually 26-30 days long.  And of course the fact that I had unprotected s*x 4 days before I ovulated on this very cycle.

I cannot face the idea of telling dh that I am pregnant (if I even am), so my plan is this.  If by day 31 AF still has not arrived I will tell dh that I am ‘late’.  I will POAS and leave the room and we can check the result together.  Or maybe I’ll send him in to do it, lol.

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek…!

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Posted June 22, 2010 by thehappynest in Uncategorized

3 responses to “The one where I fall apart – just a little bit

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  1. Hello The Happy Nest!! And welcome to blogland! I look forward to reading your adventures!
    I, for one, hope you are preggers! Our 3rd was also a surprise. Read this – and give to hubby to read too! You will never regret a 3rd baby! x
    http://theweaversnest.typepad.com/the_weavers_nest/2008/06/i-need-to-talk-about-luke.html

    • Kirsty – thank you so much for this, you’ve definitely put a big smile on my face 🙂 The one thing I’ve always maintained is that I don’t want to look back and regret NOT having a third baby, so maybe this is my chance! Who knows?! I’ll definitely keep you posted. Thank you!!!!

  2. First off–thanks for reading my blog! I’ll put you on my blogroll!

    Secondly–What an uncomfortable situation! Of course, as other people have said…IF you are pregnant, the situation may turn out different than what you are fearing. My advice would be to try (and I know how hard that is!) to keep calm until you know for sure whether or not you are pregnant. At that point, your plan sounds like a good one.

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